


Conversations of the Underworld

by Onlymystory



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: M/M, Marijuana, No angst here, POV Death, POV Outsider, i just needed to get this out of my head, just observations on the power of the love of immortal husbands, smashed up religion soup, when it comes to picking ideas about an afterlife
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:55:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26275258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlymystory/pseuds/Onlymystory
Summary: “You don’t know these two as I do,” Death responds, with a shake of their head and a little selfishness with the joint. “Neither would know peace without the other. Besides I don’t believe I could take one without the other, even if I wanted to.”“They are so young,” replies Hades. “All of the great faiths are well established long before they ever walked this earth as mortals. It seems unlikely that you would be so powerless.”“In the face of great love,” they answer, “all are powerless.”“Is it so great?”“Did I not tell you the story?” asks Death. “Of the day they became immortal?”or Death and Hades have a conversation about the epic love of Joe and Nicky.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 47
Kudos: 313





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a pithy little thing that took up residence and insisted on staying until I wrote it.

They arrive quietly, coming to the underworld for their usual reasons, a bit of rest and respite, and friendly conversation.

“You just missed Maalik,” says Hades as he emerges with greetings and an outstretched hand. 

“Thank goodness,” they mutter in return. “Here for his annual collection, I assume?”

Hades nods. “You’d think you’d get along better, being practically brothers and all.”

Death rolls their eyes and passes three little tins over to Hades. “I have many brothers and sisters and most of them annoy me.”

Hades sniffs the contents of each tin with appreciation. As Death had suspected, he picks the last tin. The strain comes from a small farm in Afghanistan and has always been a particular favorite of theirs. Other cannabis may come and go, but some things remain consistent. “I take it you still aren’t using Azrael these days then.”

“If you must have a name, Mara’s been my preference of late.”

“I don’t have to have a name,” answers Hades with a shrug. 

Death sits, motioning for Hades to go ahead.

Hades rolls carefully, always a skilled hand with these little pleasures of theirs, and Death relaxes as they wait. “I hear rumors that you’ll be collecting one of the Old Ones soon,” says Hades as he works. 

“Did Luci tell you that?” asks Death, a puff of fog swirling around them as they laugh. “The dear boy has no concept of nuance and very little awareness. No, I thought it was true for a moment, but it seems Upstairs is just playing a bit of a game.”

“So the immortality will return?”

“Mmm. Soon enough.”

“Any of the others have an expiration date set? I should so love to meet Andromache,” says Hades. His fingers snap a small flame into the air and then he generously offers the first hit. 

Death takes it with appreciation, savoring the moment. “You ask after her so often, but you know you will never get her. None will. She predates such concepts of underworlds and purgatories and they, therefore, have no claim over her.”

“Will she live forever then?”

“I think not. Perhaps she will rule a new realm when the time comes.” Death takes another hit and passes it back to Hades. “All I’ve ever been told is that there will come a time when she walks with me until she chooses her next path.”

They do not care so much for Andromache, her interests do not match their own. The story of the two men, the lovers, and muses of a millennium, is far more interesting. Death says as much.

“Which will you take first?”

“Honestly if I were to ever take one, I would have to take both,” says Death. “I couldn’t possibly leave one without the other. That would be far too torturous a thing for both.”

“Are they meant to be tortured then? You always speak of them so fondly, I assumed He would get them in the end.”

Death smiles, in a manner of speaking, their lips contorted in a mockery of the concept. “Oh, He gets them. He claimed them long ago.”

Hades takes a long drag and passes to Death. “We both know anyone who passes through the Gates knows an unshakeable peace. Only one would suffer until their time came as well.”

“You don’t know these two as I do,” they respond, with a shake of their head and a little selfishness with the joint. “Neither would know peace without the other. Besides I don’t believe I could take one without the other, even if I wanted to.”

“They are so young,” replies Hades. “All of the great faiths are well established long before they ever walked this earth as mortals. It seems unlikely that you would be so powerless.”

“In the face of great love,” they answer, “all are powerless.”

“Is it so great?”

“Did I not tell you the story?” asks Death. “Of the day they became immortal?”

Hades coughs a little in surprise before settling and taking a deep hit. “Only that they were called to such a life together. Well, you did not tell me this, but it is what I’ve heard from others.”

Death laughs in spite of themselves. “They were never called to this. They were never supposed to be immortal.”

“You are joking?!”

“Yusuf died first,” answers Death. “Only by a split second, but still first. His spirit looked at me as his body faded, spat out a ‘fuck you and fuck him’ and went storming out of my reach and back to his body. A moment later, Nicolo’s spirit came, looked around until he saw me, said ‘I don’t have time for this,’ and was back in his body before I had time to react.”

Hades looks utterly flabbergasted, a look Death can well appreciate. “Could you not get them back after all?”

“They repeated this nonsense a hundred times over through the next several months. Both dying, then diving back to the mortal realms like they were particularly bored. Then quite abruptly, they stopped killing each other. It was several years before one of them died again.”

“Which one?” asks Hades.

“Yusuf,” they reply. “Yusuf died and I came to collect and found myself against an unknowable force. It pushed and shoved me out of the way until I could hear Nicolo’s voice declaring that I could have them both or I could have neither, but I would never separate them.”

“So you left?”

Death finishes the last of the joint and stretches out along the bank. “I was curious in spite of myself. They were still within the years of a mortal life anyway, so I did not see it to be too much trouble. My plan was to take them in the end when they grew older.”

“But they did not grow old,” notes Hades.

“No. An intervention came from Upstairs. Said I was not to take them as long as they could do some good.”

“And do they?”

Death nods. “Theirs is kindness the world is not worthy of and yet they give it freely.” They sigh, thinking fondly of favorite moments of observation. “Really, I wouldn’t even have a choice about taking one over the other. When they go, they will go together, just as it was always meant to be.”

“How can you be sure?” asks Hades, his tone solemn yet curious.

“Because they are sure of each other,” answers Death. “And that is a powerful thing indeed.”


	2. Chapter 2

Death comes and goes over the years. They have many names and many faces and the one that stops to see Hades is not always the favorite. The world is vast as well, with many interesting lives and even more interesting deaths. Conversations of immortals are often set aside for other topics, though Hades does not doubt that Death continues to check-in. They have a particular fondness for the ones who live beyond their time.

Shared trauma, one might suggest, if one went in for such things.

On this particular visit, however, Death is practically vibrating with excitement, in a way that doesn’t match at all with the souls they’ve brought. There must be some other news.

He doesn’t have to wait long.

“Hades!” they cry as they come near. “You’ll never guess what news!”

“Can it be that Netherfield Park is let at last?” he asks wryly. 

“It has been centuries. Are you ever going to get over that damn story?”

“This from the entity that once had a tumblr account.”

“I had an aesthetic to maintain,” sniffs Death disdainfully. “A carefully crafted aesthetic.”

“Because no one would ever discern the aesthetic of Death if there weren’t pictures of fog and cryptic lines of poetry?” He regrets the words a moment later. They’re one of his dearest friends across the span of time and it doesn’t do to be unnecessarily cruel. “I apologize, darling,” he says now. “What news do you bring?”

“The immortals,” Death says, excitement renewed. “It is done.”

“Done?” Now, this is surprising. All things must end, this is true, but the last he’d heard, the changes amongst the immortals in no way suggested that their time was coming to an end. Hades voices this to Death. 

“Dead? Oh no, no-no. They are not to die. Not for a long time to come.” Death pauses, then corrects themselves. “Well, most of them. No, you’ll remember our conversation a short time ago?”

Hades raises a single eyebrow in question.

“Of Andromache and how the others wouldn’t take her because she was born before the afterlife realms were conceived?”

That conversation was nearly three centuries ago, but time is hardly linear in their professions, so Hades simply nods in answer. He does remember after all. That was a particularly good strain that Death had brought with them and so the memory held with more clarity. Still. “I’d heard rumors that some of the underworlds were being asked to take her?” he asks. “As a ruler, not a subject. She is so respected, I find it odd that none would wish to make her a part of their realm.”

Death smirks. “That’s what the Council thought.”

Hades rolls his eyes. The Council is filled with far too many self-righteous twits, who think they know best and who don’t give nearly enough respect to the guardians of the underworld realms. He motions for his friend to continue.

“It seems the unspoken understanding was that she would be offered a place in  Fólkvangr,” they explain. 

“Fólkvangr?” While a realm of warriors isn’t the strangest place to consider, it is for soldiers, not commanders. It’s difficult to imagine that as a place of peace for a warrior such as Andromache. 

Death nods. “Then it was pointed out that it could only be a place of temporary contentment if she was alone.”

“Please tell me no one was foolish enough to suggest that all the immortals could be brought to Fólkvangr?” Truly, the stupidity of some of their kin is baffling. Andromache’s faith is in her people, not in gods, but there are others, like Yusuf and Nicolo and Nile, who carry faith in both. A paradisiacal realm that welcomes one would never welcome the other. 

Death rolls their eyes. “In the midst of the argument, Yama interrupts everything. Tells everyone they’re full of shit and thinking too narrow. That they act like the rules of mortal men must apply, but this is an immortal soul they are discussing and should be approached with some creativity.”

That sounds exactly like Yama, thinks Hades. Most of the deities with mortal blood think the Council is too far up its own ass. They usually don’t even bother to attend such meetings, so for Yama to appear, means the conversation has been going on much longer than he’s been paying attention. 

“So,” continues Death, “after most of them start staring at each other in confusion, Osiris suggests they just create a new realm, one only for immortals such as these.”

“That’s actually not a terrible idea,” says Hades, somewhat slowly as he processes. “The only real trick is making sure those that do hold a belief in a deity--or deities--can still see them, should they so desire.”

“Anubis solved that one. Forged a doorway from the Council’s meeting room and opened up a realm behind it. Anyone with an invitation to the Council can be invited into the new realm.”

“When will you collect her then?” he asks. 

“Collect her?” 

“Our realms cannot exist without the soul of one with mortal blood…” Hades realizes the truth of the matter a mere second before Death can voice it. “You’re not just here to relay gossip. You’re here to collect from me.”

Death nods. “He’s been in the fields for millennia, has he not?”

“Indeed.” 

“He’ll be perfect until the time comes for another to join him. He’ll shape the realm into the perfect place for all of them.”

Hades smiles ruefully. “Of that, I am sure. Come, I’ll take you to him. But be forewarned, Persephone will be rather angry with you for taking him away from her.”

“He has dwelled in your realms,” answers Death. “If he wishes to invite her, she can visit.”

“She’ll like that. Persephone has long considered Lykon to be one of her dearest friends.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are literally two pieces of information in this chapter that I need for a different fic I'm writing, but a scene between Death and Hades wouldn't work there at all. So I wove this little snippet together so it could stand on its own as an addition to this fic and now I can just reference it whenever I get the wip done.
> 
> Also weaving together this many mythologies and deities is exhausting. Though there are a few sneaky references tucked in as well, if you can find them.


End file.
